Added: Joslynn Caddell - Date: 18.12.2021 22:17 - Views: 37797 - Clicks: 6877
Log in. Jump to Latest Follow. Status Not open for further replies. ed Jun 17, I'm 54 my wife is 52 and we haven't had sex in five years. She is going through menopause and says she just has no interest in sex. I am at my wits end.
Besides no sex she shows no affection what so ever. I've tried numerous times over the years, not to have sex but just be affectionate toward her. Rub her back hold her hand kiss her neck and get no responce. I tell her often how beautiful she is.
Which by the way is absolutely true. She looks better now then she ever has. Whenever we go out I always see men checking her out. She knows she is very attractive. A couple of months ago I asked her if she loved me, she said yes. Then I asked if she was in love with me and she said yes. I asked if she was having an affair and her response was "with who" then she said no.
Then she said because I don't want sex you think I'm having an affair?
I said sex is a small part of it, you don't show any affection toward me. Her reply was "I'm sorry ". I said I wasn't looking for an apology. A couple of months go by and nothing has changed. About a week ago she comes home from one of the many nights out with friends, I'm already in bed. She gets in bed and I tell her it's not fair to string me along like thisI know you don't love me so just be honest and tell me the truth. Some more words back and forth and tears.
She says she does love menot having an affair. She couldn't imagine spending he life with anybody else. Then she said her business makes her happy and that is what is important to her. Then she tells me a story of a friend of hers about our age that married a man 22 years older and he has lost interest in sex and gave her permission to have sex outside the marriage. So my wife said she would understand if I did that. My head was spinning. In a million years I wouldn't think she would say something like that. So is she having an affair, does she love me. I don't know what the hell to think.
I am seriously considering moving out.
ed Jun 28, So there are two outcomes from a possible investigation 1. She has an affair with our without sex and you do not get sex anyway. She has no affair and you do not get sex anyway. I would say it does not matter what is happening, you have no sex life and you are not going to get one. Can you live with that? If not you have to divorce and find another woman for whom love is more comprehensive. ed Dec 26, Have you started investigating her? Might be time to be a VAR voice recorder in her car to see who's she talking to.
If you have access to her cell phone bill, you'll know quickly if something is up. She could also have a burner phone that you don't know about, which is how you'll catch her with a VAR. I'd say divorce her and find someone to have sex with. Don't waste anymore years being miserable. You don't have much time left. But like SeeListenLove above said, does it even matter? You aren't getting sex either way! ed Apr 10, So she granted you a hall pass GuyInColorado said:.
EllisRedding said:. ed Dec 3, A VAR is a voice activated recorder.
Most people who are having an affair use their car as a private phone booth. One of the easiest ways to find out if your spouse is having an affair is to put a VAR in their vehicle.
Use adhesive backed velcor to secure it in place. Then see if she is talking to some affair partner while driving around. Don't jump at the hall pass. It could be a cover for her own actions. You really need to re-think staying married to her.
She says that her business is the most important thing to her. You and her marriage should be the most important thing. Apparenlty you make her life easy in some important ways, so she wants to keep those things around. Have you considered divorce? I personally would not stay in a marriage that was like that ed Jun 26, Do some research. Check into things like how sex releases bonding chemicals the same ones used to bond mother to infant during breastfeeding Especially since many men report that they use sex specifically to feel close to their partners.
Explain to your wife. Tell her that there is no reason to stay in a sham marriage where your physical AND emotional needs will be getting met elsewhere. Tell her that she can either re-prioritize, put your marriage first, seek medical help in the form of hormone therapy to get her libido back, and start having sex with you again or you're moving out, separating, and filing. Then follow through if nothing changes within, say, 6 months. EleGirl said:. Zane said:.
She won't do hormone therapy for fear of cancer. As far as threating to move out, about three years ago I did say I was leaving and the only thing she said was your going to leave me with the morgage and I'll lose the house. She never said I love you and don't want to to leave. She is good at making me feel guilty. I'm going to look into a VAR. ed Jul 4, I didn't need HRT after menopause and I didn't lose desire. Many women don't.
I'd be suspicious of her many nights out with friends. Not many married 52 year olds are out all that often. Her business is going to provide cold comfort when she's divorced. Treat her concerns as callously as she is treating yours.Affectionless marriage wife
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